I have not been able to pull the strings of my WIP together.  I have used every excuse in the world to dilly-dally.  I have made myself sit down and added a few sentences, and edited.  But could not propel the story to where it needed to go.

I simply did not want to take these people there.  I have a life that is a certain way and causes me to be a certain way.  I have gone into way too much detail in other posts on my blog, so most of you that stop here with any frequency know that I am a raving nutcase most of the time.

My stories are fluff. I am not reaching for the stars here.  Maybe I should be.  Maybe I should take it all a little more seriously.  But mostly, lately, it as been an effort and a drag.  The last 3,000 words were drawn out of me with a block and tackle.

I kind of didn’t know why I started doing this.  But it has been fun, and I am not ready to stop. I have just enough positive feed back and revenue to keep me in the game. But this time, and maybe from now on, it has been too much like work.  I am pretty sure my fiction is all revisionist history on a very personal level.  Some people would read some of these stories and get highly pissed off or strangely elated.  But that is neither here nor there.  Well, actually it is maybe the whole here and there.

Bunch of troubling stuff going on in the real life.  Nothing we can’t handle.  We have pulled through the worst of it.  “And when the hardest part is over, we’ll still be here.”  I think that is why I am holding the strings of this story so closely to myself.  What will I do when it is out of my head?  Where can these people go?  I am way too much in love with them.  I am god for them and they are my creations.  I control what they say and do.  I think.  Tonight, it kind of poured out and I had to close  the Word file, because tears were running down my cheeks.  You know how sometimes you are by yourself and no one can see you,  but you  still feel like an idiot?  Yeah.  That’s where I’m at.

I guess it is nice to have a totally imaginary place to go when reality sucks.

Photo attribution:  grlonthemuv.blogspot.com


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